Good clean anonymous fun.

So here’s the thing...

You’re sitting there around your kitchen table with a little group of friends.

You know, you’ve got the knitting out, you’re shooting the breeze, really just minding your own business and having a nice ol’ time.

Then all of a sudden this person in a Ku Klux Klan cloak and a Gorilla-gram mask crashes into your home, pees in your kitchen sink right in front of you, then runs out again, before you even get a chance to even say “Hey, wait a minute”.

Just like that.

And it’s real weird.

Thing is, you don’t have to be Sherlock Holmes to figure out who’s under the mask there coz their DNA is all over the joint.

Unpleasant business all in all though.

By blogging, I feel I’m inviting people into my home in a way, to sit around the virtual kitchen table for a couple of minutes, and a certain unwritten contract of trust is entered into. The last thing I’m really wanting is the Phantom Pee-er violating that trust.

I went to an all girl high school, and in my year there were roughly 2 groups. There were the ‘Cosmo Girls’ (after their choice of recess reading Cosmopolitan – read as Homecoming Queens), and there were the ‘Arty Dags’ (who read NME during recess – read as nerds or Talent-less Trolls).

Needlesss to say, I was in the latter group.*

It’s interesting how some things never change.

So you know where to find me, I’ll be under my bridge. Careful crossing... ‘specially at night.

*I'd like to state for the record I have nothing against Cosmo...I'm merely making an ethnographic point.


Blogger MWM said...

hmm. um, so I guess I was in the "not a clue" group.
did something happen here online that I missed?
Cause if there is peeing going on, I want to know.

29 March 2007 at 11:56 am  
Blogger Madge said...

Rock on, sister. Some people, they're just jealous because they'll never be the truly cool kids in the schoolyard. Heh.

And as an aside, I know that troll! I've visited that troll!

29 March 2007 at 12:16 pm  
Blogger M-H said...

hee hee. From one TT to another - well done.

29 March 2007 at 12:20 pm  
Blogger Rose Red said...

Nice response Carson. Love the picture (and look, now you've got 46 bloglines subscribers - so there, anonymous!!!) (heh, sorry for becoming suddenly school-yardy - couldn't help myself).

29 March 2007 at 12:58 pm  
Blogger Ashley said...

OH, lord--people are so awful. Sic Scout on 'em.

29 March 2007 at 1:54 pm  
Blogger Kate said...

I'm a troll, mouldy ol,
I'm a troll, mouldy ol,
I'm a troll, mouldy ol, and I'm going to eat you for my supper.

Lets hear it for the Trolls!!!

29 March 2007 at 1:59 pm  
Blogger Heather Moore said...

That anonymous comment was very darned wierd. Reminds me of our psychotic neighbour's vile outbursts, actually. It's so hard to ignore the doofuses of the world, but I'm trying to learn, and your retort shows that you're pretty good at it already.

For the record, I consider yours to be the best-written blog that I read, and I look forward to every update. I would subscribe, but I don't know how! So there!

29 March 2007 at 5:48 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just delurking for moment to ponder the question:

why are shithead commenters invariably anonymous?

Is there no Shithead Pride in the world?

Love your blog, Carson.

Love your dog more.

29 March 2007 at 7:49 pm  
Blogger Terhi said...

Uh. People are weird. Love that pic though - so funny! :-)

29 March 2007 at 10:01 pm  
Blogger Di said...

Excellent come-back (assuming Anon is around to read it).
My school had loads of little subsections- I was one of the "studious music nerds" (perhaps a subset of the arty-dags?) at my high school.

29 March 2007 at 10:21 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The world's full of crazies. As long as they're virtual, it ain't so bad.

Where is that troll? I would have SO loved to see it! I wish New York still had that type of sculptural imagination. Too much corporate sponsorship here. Time to move.

30 March 2007 at 2:02 am  
Blogger chocolatetrudi said...

Ironically, this anonymous commenter is known as a 'troll' in internet terminology. A troll posts nasty messages in forums and such in order to bait others into reacting.

In my experience they're often juveniles of the age when drawing organs on pictures of people is exciting. Or else they're mentally disturbed or challenged adults.

So I wouldn't take it personally. And it's best to avoid reacting to it. Deleting the message as soon as possible is the best course of action as the person gets a kick out of seeing it there and reading the reactions to it.

30 March 2007 at 9:14 am  

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